Safe Spaces

Safe  Spaces by Annemarie Vaccaro, Gerri August and Megan Kennedy.

While reading this article, it brought me back to my high school days, of those days of being bullied because I had HORRIBLE acne and braces and wasn't the skinniest girl in the school.  I remember feeling scared as I walked in the lunchroom and looking around for one of my friends to sit with.  And while I was different from some of thee other kids I went to school with, I cannot imagine how it must feel to be truly different, to not know who I am or who will except me for the lifestyle I live.  I have had to deal with not knowing who I was, or to be going against the "norm" of being heterosexual.  My heart breaks for those kids who do not feel accepted because they are gay or lesbian, bisexual or transgender.  There will always be bullies, but its whether or not the adults that are present allow that bullying to continue or do something about it.   As the authors state in the opening " LGBT youth that are bullied for being different often feel that that have nowhere to turn....death should NOT be an option".  Every parent, teacher, principle, and coach should ensure that bullying is stopped and students are educated on the LGBT community rather than just turning that blind eye when you hear or see it happening.  There were a couple of examples in the article that should teachers using these moments as teachable or ignoring them that I found very interesting.

First there was Marcus, who comes from a family consisting of two moms.  When he explained to a peer that his mom was gay, that she liked other girls and so he had two moms, the teacher sent him to the principle's office.  Instead the teacher should have used this moment to teach the class that all families are different and some kids have a mom and a dad, some have two moms, some two dads, some just one parents and so on.  That was the teacher's bad for reacting the way that she did.

The next example that I found exceptional was the teacher named Patrick.    He had a student named Derrick who was bullying another student first by calling him gay, and then by calling him bisexual.  Instead of ignoring the situation Patrick handled it beautifully.  He made Derrick look up the word gay in the dictionary and read it out loud.  He then questioned Derrick on whether or not that's what he meant.  The next time when Derrick called the student bisexual, Patrick asked what does that mean?  When Derrick said "it means you like both boys and girls" , Patrick replied with well I have both male and female friends so I still don't understand what you are getting at".  He says if your going to use the language then we are going to talk about it.  Johnson would be proud!!
rI was baffled that there are states that ban affirmation of same sex relationships, such as Utah, South Carolina, Mississippi, Arizona, and Oklahoma.  OR how about Alabama, who actually comes right out and states that homosexuality posses a health risk.  Really people???  I thought we were past the thinking formed in 1982!!!  I'm not saying that we openly discuss LGBT with my son in our home, but I am not opposed to him understanding what it is, or leering about it in school.  And I definitely support including topics on LGBT in health classes.  I actually used the GLSEN site to find an article specifically on incorporating (or lack of incorporating) LGBT in health class and the disservice we are doing for those students.  Health class is when we are teaching students about their hormones,  their sexual urges and the changes their bodies are going through.  Why are we still teaching that as strictly heterosexual?

I will close with my favorite quote from this article on page 15: "Language is a tool.  As such we believe that speech is performative-it does things.  Words invite or exclude, recognize or erase, empower or intimidate, examine or assume.  Far from what the children's chants would have us believe, words are sticks and stones.  And those sticks and stones can either build bridges or break bones".